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Perry Hall High School: Shooting and bullying? Not so fast

28 Aug

Perry Hall High School shooting: The conversation about bullying and its impact has already started – and it’s a dangerous conversation to have.

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Stephanie Hanes, Correspondent /
August 28, 2012

The Perry Hall High School shooting Aug. 27 has sparked dangerous conversation about bullying – before we even know the details. Here, a Baltimore County police officer spoke to a parent as students were evacuated from the school in Perry Hall, Md.

Steve Ruark/AP



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It didn’t take long after Monday’s shooting at Maryland’s Perry Hall High School for the magic word to come up in press reports. Bullying.

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Stephanie Hanes


Correspondent

Stephanie Hanes is the lead writer for Modern Parenthood and a longtime Monitor correspondent. She lives in Andover, Mass. with her husband, Christopher, her daughter, Madeline Thuli, a South Africa Labrador retriever, Karoo, and an imperialist cat named Kipling.

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Soon after 15-year-old Robert Wayne Gladden Jr. allegedly opened fire in his school’s crowded cafeteria, critically injuring at least one other student, a reporter showed up at his family’s home and asked why this might have happened. The boy was bullied, answered his father, according to the Associated Press.

Another family member then said that they were all horrified, and were praying for the victims.

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The conversation about bullying and its impact has already started. Even though there’s not much additional information about the case at this point.

While there have been rumors about social media sites and networking profiles that reveal a boy with goth fashion and angry messages, police have cautioned reporters that these reports may not be substantiated.

So this bullying conversation, one could argue, is dangerous.

We’ve written before about how the concept of “bullying” has become so broad, so trendy, so amorphous, that it has all but lost any specific meaning. Over the past months, for instance, we’ve read news of a six-year-old “bully” getting suspended from school for singing popular song lyrics in the lunch line and a 68-year-old bus monitor getting “bullied” by a group of students.

(Neither of which seem to fit the US Department of Health and Human Service’s definition of bullying, which says the act involves aggressive behavior among school-aged children and involves a real or perceived power imbalance.)   

But in addition to de-toothing the idea of bullying – and possibly undermining the response to a very real problem – some child development experts say the knee-jerk connecting of “bullying” to all sorts of violent behavior, from suicide to school shootings, threatens to normalize these actions.

In other words, if it starts becoming common understanding that the “normal” response to being bullied is to commit suicide, or to get a gun and start shooting classmates, then you start setting a clear social pathway to those behaviors.

In reality, meanwhile, the connection between bullying and these outcomes is far more tenuous.

Author Dave Cullen, who was one of the journalists who first reported on the 1999 Columbine High School shootings, spent the next decade researching his book “Columbine” about what had happened there, and why; and untangling the myths of trench coats and outsiders he says he and his media colleagues created.

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“We all knew what happened there, right?” he wrote about Columbine in a New York Times opinion piece soon after this summer’s mass shooting in  Aurora, Colo. “Two outcast loners exacted revenge against the jocks for relentlessly bullying them.

“Not one bit of that turned out to be true.”

Perry Hall High School is, in many ways, a typical suburban high school. It is big and low-slung and brick; it sits in an area outside of Baltimore that is considered generally safe and middle class. Also typical – depressingly – is the narrative starting to emerge from Monday’s fear and violence there. But perhaps this time we will learn to stop and wait, and recognize that the forces behind horrific events like the one in Perry Hall are far more complicated, and individual, than any buzz word.
 

Was Kate Bullied?

20 Jul

Her unofficial biographer Sean Smith wrote that Kate was bullied at Downe House school in Berkshire, to the extent that her parents took her out of the school after two terms, and the story was given legs when it was announced that of the four charities Kate was to be patron of, one of them was Beat Bullying.

The worst story was that she had faeces put in her bed, according to Jessica Hay, who sold her story of their time together at Kate’s next school,  Marlborough College.

Now a classmates, Emma Sayle, who has remained a close friend, has spoken out in defence of the school to Adam Heliker, diarist for the Sunday Express.

“The main points of that bullying story do not add up,” says Emma.

“There was no poo in her bed because she was a day girl and not a boarder, and she was not bullied for being too perfect. The girls considered perfect were never bullied but idolised. They were the ones ruling the roost… and Kate went on to rule one of the biggest roosts in the world.”

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2012/07/19/was-kate-bullied.html

Ray Rice says he’s ‘always optimistic’ about agreeing to an extension with Ravens

14 Jul

The two-time Pro Bowler has until Monday at 4 p.m. to agree to a long-term deal with the Ravens or he’ll have to play the season under the $7.7 million franchise tag.

Rice, who handed out $20 bills to kids for dancing and doing push-ups on the stage Friday, jokingly asked those in attendance to return the favor and call Ravens general manager Ozzie Newsome and “tell him to pay me.”

He was not the only Raven to deliver that message Friday. After learning that New Orleans Saints quarterback Drew Brees, who also was franchised, had agreed to a five-year, $100 million deal that reportedly includes an NFL-record $60 million in guaranteed money, Rice’s fullback, Vonta Leach, wrote on his Twitter account: “Now I’m waiting for [Rice] to get his money he deserves. #cutthecheck.”

Rice declined to elaborate on the ongoing negotiations between the Ravens and his agent, Todd France, saying “I’m actually here for the bullying thing.”

Rice, 25, has emerged as a spokesman for anti-bullying, speaking at several events, including two in Howard County. The running back said he was motivated to speak out after learning of the death of Howard County teen Grace McComas, who committed suicide on Easter Sunday after being the victim of online bullying.

“Well you know after I heard about the story about the little girl losing her life over somebody’s words, you can’t imagine somebody’s life being taken over words. I live by the creed that sticks and stones they break your bones, but words can never hurt you. In this case, words killed somebody,” Rice said. “When you think about it, we all put ourselves in somebody’s shoes, a different family’s shoes. Whether we have kids or not, we can feel that family’s pain. I felt that pain and I felt like it’s time for me to be a voice out there. In another situation, you’re talking about retaliation. That’s not the kind of retaliation that you need in this kind of situation. It’s getting your voice out there to help any other situation.”

http://articles.baltimoresun.com/2012-07-13/sports/bal-ray-rice-says-optimistic-about-agreeing-to-an-extension-with-ravens-20120713_1_ray-rice-vonta-leach-anti-bullying