School Bullying Council

Joel Morales, a 12-year-old student in East Harlem, New York City, hanged himself after bullies at school taunted him for his size, intelligence and the death of his father, the New York Daily News reports.

Joel’s mother, Lizbeth Babilonia, found her son’s body hanging from a shower rod in the bathroom of their apartment at 11:30 p.m. on Tuesday. The paper reports Babilonia cut her son down with a knife, then had to be restrained by Inez Rodriguez, a neighbor, who kept the mother from stabbing herself with the blade.

“She had cut him down. She was trying to stab herself with the knife,” Rodriquez told the Daily News. “I knocked it out of her hand.”

According to the New York Post, the bullying caused Babilonia to transfer Joel to a new school, where the abuse nevertheless continued.

My daughter complained to the teachers. She was complaining and complaining,” Francisco Babilonia, Joel’s grandfather, told the Post. “It stopped for a while but it started again. The kids knew he moved and they went to the after-school club and waited for him.”

Relatives of Joel told WPIX-TV that the family filed a police report, obtained an order of protection against one of the bullies, and met with parents of the boys involved, all to no avail.

A vigil was held in front of the boy’s apartment building where Joel’s aunt, Angelica Babilonia, told the Post she was outraged to see some of the bullies admist the candles and prayer.

“He was an angel. No one should have to go through this. I just want him back,” Angelica told the paper.

Joel’s tragic story reflects on an alarming number of similar instances across the country, the most prominent of which is likely the death of Jamey Rodemeyer, who took his life at the age of 14 last September. Rodemeyer cast a national spotlight on gay bullying in schools, particularly the complex emotional and social issues that lead to extreme measures like suicide.

The teenager killed himself after posting a viral “It Gets Better” video, and his case drew further national attention when Lady Gaga vowed on Twitter to make bullying illegal — even going to the president himself to address the issue.

Rodemeyer’s death has cast a national spotlight on gay bullying in schools, particularly the complex emotional and social issues that lead to extreme measures like suicide.

While police ultimately said the bullying Rodemeyer endured could not be considered criminal, a lawsuit brought by the parents of Phoebe Prince, a 15-year-old Irish immigrant in Massachusetts who committed suicide after relentless bullying in 2010, was settled for $225,000.

Most recently, 13-year-old Rachel Ehmke hanged herself after months of abuse by her peers at Kasson/Mantorville Middle School in Minnesota. The family has said that they do not plan to press charges against those who bullied Rachel, but do wish that the school had taken heavier measures against the bullies when the taunting was first reported in the fall.

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.

Other school bullying incidents:

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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/31/joel-morales-hangs-self-bullying-dead-father_n_1559450.html

Rachel Ehmke

(Credit:
Family Photo)

(CBS/WCCO/AP) MINNEAPOLIS – A Minnesota family says their 13-year-old daughter was bullied to the point she committed suicide. But on Wednesday, officials said there will be no criminal charges filed in Rachel Ehmke’s death, reports CBS Minnesota.

PICTURES: The dangers of bullying

In a press release, Dodge County Sheriff Jim Jensen said, “while harassment and bullying were likely factors in the seventh grader’s death, there is not one incident or action done by any particular students that we believe is responsible for Rachel’s death.”

Rachel’s dad, Rick, was initially stunned when authorities decided not to charge any of the kids who allegedly bullied her. But he told the station he doesn’t want to see anyone punished and just hopes others learn that bullying is wrong.

“I want them to see what this does to people,” Rick Ehmke, of Mantorville, told the station. “Those words; not everybody can handle those words and it killed her. I will go to my grave knowing that’s what did it.”

Rachel’s parents have asked other students at the school to not target the four girls some blamed for Rachel’s suicide.

Two days before her death, investigators say Rachel anonymously sent out a derogatory text message herself to several students at Kasson-Mantorville Middle School, according to local station KTTC-TV.

“It referred to Rachel as a slut…,” Jensen told KTTC.

Her father believes Rachel sent that message as a way to get removed from school and avoid further bullying.

It was family night at the Ehmke household in Mantorville, a small town in southeastern Minnesota. Rachel, 13, got her favorite meal, fettuccine and homemade rolls. She and her dad, Rick Ehmke, horsed around, talked and laughed. Later, they were planning to watch a movie.

Rachel had seemed in good spirits, even though her dad knew bullies had been picking on her again at her Kasson-Mantorville school, where she was in the seventh grade.

“She texted me that she wasn’t going to school Monday, and she was thinking about switching schools,” said Rick. “We never got a chance to discuss it further.”

Rachel said she wanted to finish some homework.

That night, Rick found his daughter dead in her bedroom. She had hanged herself.

She was buried Friday.

“I was the one who found her,” said Rick, a nurse who was not able to revive her. “It didn’t even feel like it was real.”

Rick Ehmke and his other daughter, Brittany, have been vocal since Rachel’s death April 29, speaking out about the tragedy of bullying. The suicide has rocked the small town and surrounding area. The Rochester Post-Bulletin even wrote a front-page editorial, begging students to see the tragedy as an opportunity to stop harassing other kids.

But Rick Ehmke isn’t speaking out in anger. There is an ongoing investigation into the bullying and rumors that Rachel had turned to a website for advice on how to commit suicide. But Ehmke doesn’t think there will be charges, and hopes there won’t be any against kids who taunted his daughter.

Professionals will underscore that suicides are complicated and often the result of many things, but everyone acknowledges Rachel was having a problem with harassment at school.

“If I could, I would embrace [the bullies],” said Ehmke. “Look, they are all good kids. They are 13. They made some bad choices, and right now everybody is paying for it. I feel anybody who was bullying Rachel is already paying for it right now. They’ll probably think about it their whole lives, though I hope they don’t.”

Rachel was not the stereotypical victim of bullies. She was pretty, popular and involved in school activities.

“She was in soccer, volleyball, basketball, dance class,” said Ehmke. “She was always engaged, right up until Saturday night. She was engaged in life. She had a comfortable life. I think there was some jealousy.”

School officials told Ehmke of some classmates harassing his daughter months ago. He thought it had stopped, because Rachel was no longer complaining about it. But the Friday before she died, there were more accusations of bullying, Ehmke said.

“I didn’t know that it really never stopped,” said Ehmke. “Her best friend said they were sneaking into the locker room to eat lunch to avoid it.”

Bullies had scrawled hurtful names on Rachel’s locker and put gum in her books, he said. Social media magnified the problem because it seemed she could never escape the taunts, not even on weekends.

“We tried to monitor her social media and limit it,” said Ehmke. “But you can’t control the Internet unless you lock her away 24 hours a day.”

When the harassment was brought to school officials the day before her death, Rachel was afraid getting her family and school involved would only make things worse. “She tried to handle it by herself.”

Social media has played a role since Rachel’s death, too, with angry students going after those thought to be the bullies. Ehmke has a plea to those students who would avenge Rachel’s death: Don’t. Out of respect for the family, stop.

“We are not pointing fingers at anybody,” said Ehmke. “We are not hoping for any ill will for any bullies. We cannot control how kids feel about this, but my wife and I want peace. Everyone needs to come together, even the bullies, because they also need help now, too.”

Ehmke said he has been wandering around the house, “opening and closing drawers and forgetting why. The kids have been troupers. That’s the kicker — no matter how hard it hurts, life has to go on,” he said.

Meanwhile, Ehmke begs young people: “Stop before you push the send button,” he said. “Think about what you are going to send. Do you really hate this person so bad, and why? These are kids, with lots of hormones and emotions. They can take that hurtful word to heart, and it can kill them.”

jtevlin@startribune.com • 612-673-1702

http://www.startribune.com/local/150301265.html